SELL IT AND THEY WILL COME^©

Live 19 Apr 1996 version

Well I fell asleep on the couch last night, and I woke up with the TV on
It's going pretty good so far [chuckles]*
There was a woman in tight cotton exercise shorts and a big plastic machine she was climbing on
She said "The Abacycle guarantees ten inches off your waist, you lose 50 pounds in just 3 minutes a day"
Well I went to bed knowing the revolution had been postponed and everything was ok

You can try it, you can buy it, it'll help you in bed, but don't be fooled folks, there's only one
I forget that guy's name but somebody said "Sell it and they will come, boys just sell it and they will come"

Well I switched the channels and there was Evel Kenievel, I thought that he was dead
I found myself sitting there quietly, hanging on each and every word that he said
And he said "Now folks, the Stimulator guarantees to remove all pain from your life, and the best day of your life will be when you try this little device out"
The camera moved in as he said, "Let me tell you ladies and gentlemen, pain's something old Evel knows a little bit about"

You can try it, you can buy it, it'll help you in bed, but don't be fooled folks, there's only one
I forget that guy's name but somebody said "Sell it and they will come, boys just sell it and they will come"

Well a fellow comes on shouting "Free haircuts for life!", somehow you cut your hair with your vacuum cleaner
They actually sell that in the States*
And then I switched channels and there was Dionne Warwick, communing with her psychic friends
I watched for hours, taking warmth, comfort, and pleasure in things that I despise
Touched by how much they needed me and my thirty nine ninety five

You can try it, you can buy it, it'll help you in bed, but don't be fooled folks, there's only one
I forget that guy's name but somebody said "Sell it and they will come, boys sell it and they will come"

So Dionne, Cher, and all my late-night friends, well I drink to your health
And Tony Little, America's personal trainer, please kill yourself
Now I've sold a few things myself in my time, and by the way folks, there's some t-shirts on your way outside
Well last night I dreamed of lipstick and tight little cotton shorts, "Harder, faster", she breathed, "One, two, three, four, five", ride Sally ride, girl ride Sally ride

You can try it, you can buy it, it'll help you in bed, but don't be fooled folks, there's only one
I forget that guy's name but somebody said "Sell it and they will come, boys sell it and they will come"

A humorous anti-commercialism song that seems to be written solely to bring some levity to the acoustic shows of The Ghost Of Tom Joad tour. It fits a small cozy audience and suits The Ghost Of Tom Joad tour venues perfectly.

The song was played 35 times during the tour, the world premiere being on 10 Jan 1996 at the Fox Theatre, Detroit, MI, and the last known performance being on 06 Dec 1996 at BJCC Concert Hall, Birmingham, AL. The above lyrics refer to the live 19 Apr 1996 performance at ICC, Berlin, Germany.

* Spoken comments (in Italic).

Spoken intro on 19 Apr 1996 at ICC, Berlin, Germany:

Gee, I got a, I got a question for you. Do you have those late-night infomercials on, where, you know, there's a, a bunch of Americans in little shorts trying to get you to do push-ups? Yeah [chuckles]. I mean, that's unfortunately been imported over here. Uh, did you ever hear of a guy named Tony Little? [no response from the crowd] Oh fuck this song, I can't do that [chuckles]. Now, it's sort of, you see, it's, it's this sort of really stupid song about TV commercials [chuckles]. Hey, you know, oh shit, alright [chuckles]. Ok. Well... alright, I'm gonna do it [chuckles]. [cheers] Ah, no, don't, don't applaud it, it, it, it, it may just be ridiculous, alright [chuckles]. I, I can't tell, I don't know... you know, I really... oh shit, oh, I got myself into it, alright. Hm, I forget how to play it [chuckles] [Bruce hums] I figured I haven't played it in a while, why I wanna play it now? [Bruce hums again] ah, I got it, alright, here we go [cheers] [chuckles]. I, I wouldn't get too excited about it yet, it may, it just may make absolutely no sense, I can't [chuckles]. Alright.

Outro:

I told you [chuckles]. Yeah, oh man. Yeah we uh, we cover all aspects of American culture in the course of the evening [chuckles].